When Odysseus warned his men not to eat the cattle of the sun god, they listened to him in front of him — but ate it behind him. When asked, the men said they wanted to hide it from Odysseus, to which Odysseus replied:
“He is not their enemy. He is the one trying to save them.”
Throughout the journey, Odysseus knew his men wouldn’t survive it, though he could. Still, he kept fighting for the last one instead of abandoning them. The men lost trust in him, his ways, his thoughts — but he never lost his will to treat them as his responsibility.
He won against all, but he lost to his men.
Leaders lose right from the beginning — first, their very own people.
Whenever a leader begins, the majority doubts him. Coincidentally, the first ones are his own friends and family — the ones to whom he loses first. But yes, there is one person who keeps him going — sometimes a mentor, sometimes a friend — but mostly, he loses his own people first. Once he gains a little success, be it money or power, is when these people start coming back.
Then comes the midway. He loses partners, believers, teammates.
When a company is created for a purpose, a few partners or initial members often start leaving if success isn’t achieved within the first few years. Instead of working on the product, the idea, or the processes, they start working with different people, citing people as the problem — forgetting that they were part of it too. But more importantly, they lose trust in the leader who, in the best years of his life, invested in training his best people — who happened to be them. The leader loses the ones who started with him. Once he is able to provide for the needs of his partners and teammates — be it food on a sailor’s journey or money in the corporate world — they start staying back.
In the end, whether he wins or loses, he still loses.
If he loses, he loses not just the last survivors but also his chance to be remembered. Because no one remembers the inspirers — everyone remembers the ones who conquered.
Let me give you an example.
Do you know who was the first to climb Mount Everest? It was Sir Edmund Hillary (a New Zealander mountaineer) and Tenzing Norgay, the Sherpa who accompanied him. But do you know that, in all the years before 1953 — the first time Mount Everest was conquered — there was a man regarded as Britain’s greatest mountaineer? Someone who spent over 20 years trying to conquer Everest and took part in five major expeditions to it. Each of his expeditions made it easier for the next team, thanks to the information and experience he shared with them. He led the team until 1952. But he was dropped at the last moment from the 1953 expedition. I repeat — the last moment. And you know when Everest was finally conquered? 1953. His name was Eric Shipton.
Take a pause. Sit with Eric Shipton for a while, because nobody remembers him — in the language of the world, he lost.
Now let’s talk about the winners too — they lose as well. Let me tell you how.
Winning is a moment. What comes before it, and what follows after — that’s the long journey. You think Odysseus won? Eight years of journeying followed by him winning one of the world’s greatest wars. Winners lose the most, because now they have a lot to lose — even technically. Once you’ve won, your ways are questioned. One of the greatest examples is Mahatma Gandhi. While I’m not here to defend anybody, but one of the greatest freedom fighters isn’t even regarded as a freedom fighter by many. Some are disappointed by him for calling off the Non-Cooperation Movement; others believe he was responsible for Bhagat Singh’s death. Irrespective of the facts, he lost the trust of a large population — so much so that he was shot dead.
I know I’ve taken examples from various fields here, some of which are mythical as well. However, this post is not for the ones who think leaders are losers. This post is for the leaders. So to you — leader,
“Don’t lose.”
Because throughout the journey, you’ll keep losing people — but remember, all of them are outsiders. One person whom you didn’t lose is YOU. The you inside, who knows you did what needed to be done. To the one inside who had a dream which was not to conquer but to live. Do not lose to that person. Because that’s what makes you a leader — not someone who never loses to others, but someone who never loses to himself.
Odysseus’ goal was to fight for his country — and he did that till the last moment. He was successful.
Eric Shipton’s goal was to live the moments he was at Mount Everest — and he did. He was successful.
Mahatma Gandhi’s goal was to get India freedom — and he did. He was successful.
Bhagat Singh’s goal was to begin a revolution so the freedom process is fastened — and he did. He was successful.
All of them were successful — in what they wanted. Not from what the world wanted from them.
So cheers to you, my mate. If you know you are doing what you should be doing, keep going.
One day — the world will sing for you.
A face. A fleet. A war. ….